Thursday, February 10, 2011

UBC Day 7

Day 7 — Write a letter to: Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush


Okay, I guess I will write to an ex-boyfriend. It's sort of funny to me because I went to the expectant parent group last night and it was detecting the "frogs" and finding your "prince." So I sort of reflected about that relationship with the frog and it's funny to me that I should probably be more angry about it than anything else. I guess he didn't really break my heart the hardest (I will get to that letter later) but he hurt me the worst. But I've let it go and I've forgiven him for what he did to me. It's funny to me that we were talking about frogs (they brought in stuffed animal frogs) and they were cute and fuzzy on the outside but they were diagnosed with some issues. I remember him being a frog he was cute on the outside but on the inside he had so many issues and I wanted to help him. I thought I was going to change him. And I almost feel like me being with him brought out the worst in him. And it was so hard for me to get out of the relationship because he would tell me that no one would want to be with me after what he's done to me and that we were only meant for each other. After a year of being with him I knew I needed to get out but I stayed another year and for that year. I started losing my feelings for him. He wasn't attractive to me anymore. He was sick and disgusting. I was never treated so badly in my life. But I luckily got out of it. It wasn't easy especially after the phone call that he was going to use the money for the engagement ring he saved up to buy a gun and kill me. Oh, that was a special moment and he got the cops called on him for that. Yeah and I've forgiven him right???! haha. It's been two 1/2 years since that relationship ended. I've seen him since then and he's come into my work a lot recently (ughhhh. I need to find a new job.) but I'm not just going to ignore him. A part of me just feels sorry for him. Sorry for the mental and emotional issues that he still hasn't overcome. He's sent me e-mails before I got married telling me that if it doesn't work out that he'll always be there. Yeah. He's sort of a creep. I know the way I was treated I was wrong but I guess I needed it to know what it was like to be treated right. I love my husband more than anything and he is the COMPLETE opposite of my ex. I don't have to "fix" him or change him. He's already perfect for me. I feel so grateful for my husband and for everything he has done for me in my life. He has swept me off my feet again and again. I fall in love and he's there to catch me because he's falling right along with me. It's an amazing feeling. I just want to pinch myself. Even though all the crap that I went through. Tayler still loves me. He has forgiven my past (and he may or may not want to punch my exes in the face) and loves me for the person I am today. I wasn't ready for him two 1/2 years ago. I was ready for him in October 2009. We were driving home from Andee's house and he was telling me that it was crazy that when he was 16 (I was 14) he drove through my home town and it never crossed his mind that he was going to marry a girl from that town. And I never thought I was going to deserve such an incredible guy like him. :) Tayler is my prince.

Tell me: A song that reminds you of a certain event


When I heard this song it just reminded me of a certain event. Not that I still have the feelings. Just remember the event.
I want to know: A photo that makes you happy.


3 comments:

  1. Love your new layout. glad you came out on the better end with that relationship.

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  2. Duuuuuuuuuude. That is messed up! So glad you found your prince. <3

    PS - Also loving the new layout!

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  3. Love your blog! You and your hubby are sooooo cute!!! Looking back at some of the pictures of you from before and after you met him you can really tell from your smile that you are truly happy. Good luck with everything!

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