Zee Dress

I totally purchased this dress (well, my mom did) a month ago. I went to a bridal fair and I had tried on dresses probably the week before with Alyssa. I decided that was the one. At the bridal fair I saw it, and I pointed out that was the dress. And the lady said, "Good thing you got it. It's a pretty popular dress and has been going out pretty fast."

My heart dropped.

I called my mom ASAP and told her we had to go to Allyse's Bridal and get it.

We also got the veil and we're planning on getting a sparkly headband with it.

I'm SO excited.

I'm even more excited. We just put our deposit down on our photographer, yesterday. I've talked with her maybe two weeks before Tayler proposed. She has some awesome ideas and I can't wait for them to come to life.

I get butterflies in my stomach just thinking that this is actually happening. You totally just DREAM of this moment since you're a little girl and it's happening before your eyes.

I still can't even believe it's been two weeks exactly since I've been engaged. But that's because I've had a lot going on. Jessica passed away a few hours after Tayler had proposed. And yeah. It's been an emotional rollercoaster. The one minute I want to be selfish and happy for myself, I remember Jessica and how I should mourn over losing my best friend.

I mourn over thinking that I can't have her be at my wedding. But I know she'll be inside the temple and by my side as she should be on my wedding day. I think about how I could've been there for her on her wedding day if she was still here.

Tayler does get a little upset that I can't take the time to enjoy being engaged. I try really hard. I do like being engaged. It's probably the best feeling in the world knowing that I'm going to be with my best friend for the rest of my life and through eternity. It's just bittersweet. Really.

I do have my times where I get excited with all of the planning and happy to be with Tayler. Don't get me wrong. I just don't know how to explain it.

Yes, I'm happy.

Yes, I look AWESOME in that dress.

Yes, I can't wait to be with Tayler forever. :)

Oh P.S. You'll be hearing from me a lot more. RuthAnn is doing a school project about people writing in their journals everyday for two weeks. Blogs count. So. You'll get to enjoy the next 14 days of blogs from ME.