But looking back at 2 years from today, I didn't think I would make this far. Yes, eventually I wouldn't be pregnant anymore. Eventually, that plus sign was going to be a baby. And yes, that meant I had to make a decision for that baby. 2 years have passed and I've dodged that bittersweet bullet or drank the wrong glass of "water" and not pregnant again. 2 years in a row (yay?).
For those of you who don't know my lovely story, I'll share it with you what it was like 2 years ago, today.
January 21, 2009 was a normal day to me. Nothing new except some allergic reaction on my legs had resurfaced a few days before. And 11 days before that, my boyfriend had broken up with me. At the time, I was moving on, I knew at some point I was going to have to return all of his CD's, movies and clothes that were in the backseat of my car and being the desperate, broken-hearted 18 year old that thought had found true love- needed to find something to hold on to.
I drove to the doctors to see what was wrong with me this time. Around Christmas, I started getting sick and ended up getting a sinus infection and I was taking antibiotics for it. Only to find out I was allergic to my antibiotics and was taking some for those. And for those of you who don't know, birth control and antibiotics cancel each other out and could result in a pregnancy. I did not know that bit of information.
The doctor asked me the usual questions and then asked me if I had missed my cycle. I had to think back when I had it last and when I should be having it. I am very regular and knew that I would have it every 28 days. And I realized that it had been passed 28 days. Not by much, possibly a week. I had a little bit of a sinking feeling but I denied that I was pregnant. The doctor asked me to take a test just in case. To this day, I had never seen a positive pregnancy test for myself. I didn't see it when the doctor did it. The only time I knew was when the doctor walked into the room, which seemed like an eternity for him to tell me the results and he told me, "It looks to me, your test is pretty positive."
Pretty positive??! Like I could be pregnant or I couldn't be pregnant? What are you trying to say? Well, when it's positive, it's positive. I'm expecting. The only time that I knew for a fact that I was pregnant is when they took a blood test after my "pretty positive" urine test and they printed out a piece of paper with the levels of pregnancy hormones and to come back next week to do another one to see if I was going to "stay pregnant." From what the paper told me I was about 5-7 weeks pregnant.
I love this song by Pink.
I'm using the Radio Edit because the song is called, "F***in' Perfect" and says it in the song a few times.
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel like you're nothing you are perfect to me