Friday, August 14, 2009

Olive Garden&Contractions

I can't really think of a title for this post. Ha. But I thought I would update. I've been so bad lately. So I'm doing it now.

Today, I woke up around noonish. Yep. I was tired. And I got on Facebook and saw a message from N saying, "What's wrong with your phone? I'm supposed to meet D and V today but I have no way of getting a hold of them." So I tried calling him on my phone. But, I realized I totally spaced on paying my phone bill. I called him on my house phone. He wanted to meet them around 2 or whatever. But it took me like an hour to try to get a hold of them because they are staying at a cabin and there is no reception out there and the phone that they had, it was busy. I got a hold of them around 1:45 and it would take them 45 minutes to get out there. Well, we decided to meet around 3. We went to Olive Garden.
Little did we know, N had already been to Olive Garden earlier. And he had the same server from before and she says to him, "I swear, I served your twin brother today!" And he says, "Actually that was me." I said, "That's embarrassing!"

Well, D and V were wanting to get to know N and asked him all these questions about himself. He talked about Soccer, Lacrosse, and Ballroom. Then talked about family and what he was interested in.
They did ask him about Olivia. They asked, "So if Olivia could have one of your traits which one would it be?" And he says, "I hope the trait she doesn't inherit is my stubbornness."
I couldn't help but laugh. I know that trait, all too well.
Then he said, "I would want her to have my openness and understanding." I honestly had to turn my head and try to stop smirking. I'm thinking, Really? YOU'RE understanding?! Where have you been the past 9 months?
He noticed that I did that and said, "She doesn't believe me with that." I said, "You're right. I don't. But I'm not going to say anything."
They asked him about how his family was handling it or how his parents handled it.

He was saying that his parents were kind of like we'll support you in whatever happens. And I guess NOW his mom is really excited for Olivia to be here. She's sad that one of her grandkids will be placed for adoption but she wants to make quilts for her and things like that.
I just thought that was weird. Because his parents have NEVER been supportive of it... well of me, anyway. I gave them my number after my 12 week appointment. I have never heard from them ONCE to see how I was doing or Olivia.
It's like, Yep. I'm the only one who got myself pregnant. Their son didn't get me pregnant. But he did help make their grandkid. Way to go. Sorry, that's just the way I see it.
He was saying that it was hard for him because he does care about Olivia and that it's his baby and he loves kids and wants to be there for her. It's just hard for him to be open with me because I get frustrated with him. I said to him, "I tell you what you can do, it's not that hard." He said, "I know. I try to do what I can."
He was telling D and V that he wants to be as open as possible with them and with Olivia. He would want D and V to tell him when they'll be in town so he can see Olivia. And he'll want pictures and stuff.
Let's see... the BEST part was. He was trying to make it sound like he's been there for me as much as possible.
He was like rubbing my belly and trying to feel her move. I'm like, excuse me? What are you doing? ha.
Because honestly, before. He would have NEVER done that. It was like he did it on purpose to show that he is involved.
We were talking about how the other day Olivia kicked V's sister's hand off my belly. And N was like, "She gets that from me."
When I was in Virginia I sent N a picture from the 3D/4D ultrasound from my phone and he says he's been showing it to everyone and how everyone compliments how beautiful she is. I'm like, "She gets that from me."
We were walking outside and he pointed out that my belly looked lopsided because lately, Olivia has been very fond of sitting on my left side. And he poked at it and he says, "That's her butt or something." I just turn to him and say, "How do you even know?!" And he says, "I don't. But I bet that's what it is. She's mooning me." You're the most understanding guy I've ever met. HA.

He then was trying to get affirmation that he has been doing a much better job at returning my texts and calls. I said to him, "No." Just flat out. He was like, "Come on! You know I have! Don't say no!" I just didn't say anything to that.

It was all sort of rushed because N had to leave at 4:30 to be with his friend. Right. Because he hasn't known about meeting with D and V for weeks. Yet. He thought it was last week. I just forgot about it? Really?
I hope some of you get my sense of humor.
I probably sound like I'm really hating on N. I don't hate him.
I just was frustrated and stressed trying to put everything together last minute because I didn't think we were going to go out to eat until later that night. And so then, I'm thinking. I'm glad that your friends are so much more important than meeting the people who are going to raise your daughter who NEVER come out here and live on the East coast. Glad to see where your priorities are.

I feel a lot of the stuff he was saying was inconsistent of what he has actually been doing. He says he's always there or tries to be. I have no idea. What do I even say to any of that? The only time I've been seeing effort is in the last month or so because he wants to be there when she's born and he knows I can take that away.
But I know, I would regret it more if I didn't let him see her.
To be honest, a lot of people have told me I've been TOO nice to him that he doesn't deserve anything.
They may be right, but I can't help it. I've tried to be mean but I always go back on my word because I care too much.

Let's see.

After that me, D, and V went to Shade then to the D.I.
My friend called me and invited me to see my friend in the hospital since she was due September 30 and her water broke on Sunday. Yep. So she's going to be having her baby early. She's been in the hospital since Sunday. It's sad.
At the hospital, right before we left, I had this FAT contraction. Ha. I'm going to be blunt. I was urinating and that's when it came. So I stopped because I was SO scared I was going to have my baby in the toilet. It's a legit fear after watching the show, I didn't know I was pregnant.
It lasted about 1-2 minutes. But I haven't had any since. No baby! Sorry!
It was all over, in the front and back, I sat down and just wanted to arch my back and make the pain go away.
Atleast it was in the hospital, probably the best place for me if I really did start going into labor.

V's mom gave me a card (and a gift card for a massage, GLORIOUS.) It was such a sweet card. Ha. I'm going to cry, but my favorite part in the card that she says, I hope she doesn't mind me sharing,
"I know I can't ease your discomfort but I hope this will help. You are truly an angel and full of love. Olivia is blessed to have 2 mothers who love her with all their hearts and want the very best for her."

It helped. ;) No worries.
She is also very blessed to have 4 sets of grandparents who love her as well.

5 comments:

  1. That is so true! Olivia is truly blessed to have 2 Wonderful Mothers that Love and Care for her dearly! And she'll always know that she is Loved by Both of them! :D And I hope things can get better with Nic, he sounds like he has been really stubborn and he sounds like he doesn't even realize it when he saying those "Misunderstaindings" Or inconsistent lies! But I was pretty much laughing that he says one thing and you pretty much get right back at him saying! NO! You've been like this and not that! Where have you been you crazy Goose? All of the sudden he is being oh such a wonderful birthdaddy! :P "Every man can become a father, but it takes LOVE to become a DADDY!!!"(True LoVe that is!)

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  2. Hmmm, sounds like it would have been better if you hadn't been there. Maybe he really thinks all those things about himself, but that is sooo annoying that he was trying to rub your belly and act like he's been so supportive. Maybe this is his way of making the effort. That's what you've wanted this whole time, but it sure would be nice if he was doing it even when Dustinn and Val weren't around.

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  3. HAHA. Are you saying I made things worse?! No way! I only put in the hilarious stuff. Mostly they talked to him about his life. I kind of stayed quiet and ate my lunch/dinner.

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  4. Thank you so much for setting up lunch with Nic. (And I'm sorry our line was busy forever! I'm sure it was stressful not being able to get ahold of us.) Anyway, we're really grateful it worked out and we were able to get to know Nic and be with both of you.

    On another subject, I could tell how comfortable Bradshaw felt, and how much he loved your mom after just the short time with her. (She was SO NICE to play in the water with him.) Olivia is really lucky to have so many wonderful grandparents. What do Baby Dragon & Sweetie call your parents?

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  5. Sorry, I had to delete the other comment because it had a girls name from group and it's confidential and stuff. :/ It's okay. You didn't know :)
    But, I'm sure my body is preparing. It has been preparing the past couple of days since that contraction! I've been having Braxton Hicks up the wall!
    BD&Sweetie call my parents grandma and papa.

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