tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post950834335996532767..comments2023-10-11T08:41:39.055-07:00Comments on Stefanie Jinelle's Journey: StressStefanieJinellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08501326936851342628noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-44274532202547294942010-06-24T23:14:20.231-07:002010-06-24T23:14:20.231-07:00@Lynd Fam. That totally makes sense about the whol...@Lynd Fam. That totally makes sense about the whole "jack mormon" thing. But I guess what bothers me are the ones that lie about it to everyone but still believe they are "perfect." I don't know. That is just a big deal to me. I know people can make mistakes and use the atonement. I'll use an example. I knew a girl who had premarital sex up until like two weeks before she was supposed to LEAVE on her mission. She had her mission call and still felt like it was chill to go. Of course, a good friend talked her out of it. I believe a mission isn't just a vacation to go bang whoever. It's an errand of the Lord, it's a service to Him. So why teach one thing and the way the Lord wants you to live your life and do another and go against what you're preaching? Or why do drugs or drink and sit in a temple recommend interview and be asked "have you been keeping the word of wisdom", and lie? Just so you can prove to everyone that you are a Mormon and can have a temple recommend? It's like it's some sort of right of passage to flash that about to everyone like it's a business card. Cool. I would hope a temple recommend or taking the sacrament every Sunday would mean a lot more to people than that. Ya know?<br />It's like telling your bishop that Sunday that you keep the word of wisdom and law of chasitity and take the sacrament and that very same night you drink, do drugs, and have sex. And do that every single Sunday. <br />Ha. I hope that all makes sense too. :/ <br />But I totally understand. Thanks for the mil advice (everyone) haha. I just know I have a lot to learn with that and right now I'm just keeping myself out of it because I don't want to cause anymore drama than there already is.StefanieJinellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08501326936851342628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-34617579960062456542010-06-24T21:04:55.730-07:002010-06-24T21:04:55.730-07:00Geez, sorry things have been so tough recently. Th...Geez, sorry things have been so tough recently. That's seriously not cool and I really hope things get better.<br /><br />I get what you said about everyone being a "Jack Mormon" but that's assuming that in order to be a "Real Mormon" you have to be perfect - which isn't the case. ALL of us have our vices and our pitfalls but that's kind of the point. If we didn't have a little "jack" in us then there would be no point for The Atonement. I dunno, I just think the whole term "Jack Mormon" is pointless. Did that even make sense? LOL...<br /><br />Oh and coming from someone who has wanted to outright drown their mother in law - all I can say is: suck. LOL! Just be cordial and put up with it. Like the other comment said. Things will get better with time. Just put up with her. And for God's sake never force your husband to choose between you guys. That's just a whole mess you don't want to get into, LOL.<br /><br />Geez, don't you love how all of us read your blog then automatically feel like we can weigh in on your life? LOL. Sorry if it comes off like that. Just trying to help :)Danyahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13737740754021599451noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-41686177570308696592010-06-24T10:39:01.643-07:002010-06-24T10:39:01.643-07:00I have a hand-out from one of my psychology classe...I have a hand-out from one of my psychology classes that lists the top 25 most stressful life events (and an re-adjustment scale showing the difficulty of rebounding.) The death of a friend, unemployment/job search, getting married were all on there. And to think you get them all at once! :)<br /><br />I agree with what Erika that stress doesn't end with marriage. I've seen families where hurt of something said or done remains 10,20,30 years later. <br />It really hurts when someone doesn't like you/see you for who you are. Especially when it's someone who will play an intimate role in your life. <br />Tayler's the first to be married. I'm sure it's hard for his mom to see her son grow-up and start a family of his own in another state. I'm sure she worries about not seeing him as much. Maybe she's scared and nervous---and she's definitely going about it the wrong way! I don't want her to miss out on what can be a wonderful relationship with extraordinary you. <br />The thing is, maybe she'll right the course of your relationship, but maybe she won't? ...You are beautiful and loving AND you are one of the most clever, thoughtful and forgiving people I know. <br /><br />@Anonymous: I'm curious how you mended fences with your mil. What made things better?Vhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11503246998637206824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-84454255500154375502010-06-24T00:41:55.333-07:002010-06-24T00:41:55.333-07:00I'm so glad I checked back cause- you responde...I'm so glad I checked back cause- you responded! YES I received my mission call, YES we must play kingsburg before I leave, YES I'm in Utah, and Yes I do expect you to still have my digits. lol Hit me up when you have time!Lindyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09679155192821682966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-29937593326365070342010-06-23T09:28:18.584-07:002010-06-23T09:28:18.584-07:00Stefanie...I had a breakdown the other day too. I ...Stefanie...I had a breakdown the other day too. I think that comes with planning weddings!<br />I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time. We need to hang out soon. Seriously.Andeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17864157962985816889noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-86439936188501401282010-06-22T23:59:40.923-07:002010-06-22T23:59:40.923-07:00@Erika. I have no idea at this point if she will b...@Erika. I have no idea at this point if she will be at the wedding or not. I hope everything will be worked out by then.<br /><br />@Bree. For real! The best part of it all. She had Tayler out of wedlock. And so apparently when she got married 2 years after having him she was ready. But I wasn't. And that she was good enough for husband because she had a baby but I'm not good enough for her son because I had a baby. Oh and that we're getting married "wrong" because it's not in the Temple first. But she did it right because hers was in the Temple but she still got a divorce. :/ Yeah. Temple marriages are perfect.<br /><br />@Lindy. I think I was also meaning by that I am a "human." That I'm not just a voice over the phone or another author in a blog. I breathe and I don't just get over things by writing them out. I just try to live my life each day. You can write me a book anytime :) BTW. You got your mission call yes? Are we going to play Kingsburg before you leave? Are you in Utah?StefanieJinellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08501326936851342628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-45879262058902183472010-06-22T21:17:02.831-07:002010-06-22T21:17:02.831-07:00I love this post because I think I can almost feel...I love this post because I think I can almost feel your pain as you say it. That's incredible. If I were to comment on everything you said I'd have to write a book, but the thing that stuck out to me the most is your desire to not always be seen as strong. Like you, I too am often seen as a strong one. People who know me say that I'm tough, level-headed. But I break down, I have hard days and sometimes I wouldn't mind if someone worried about me, ya know? sometimes "I want to break down and let people know I'm human." I mean of course the way that it applies to us is different but I understand your sentiment. I'm proud of you and what you have done. I probably don't know you well enough to say that, but it's true. You're in my prayers. :)Lindyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09679155192821682966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-25500607010947055622010-06-22T19:47:45.614-07:002010-06-22T19:47:45.614-07:00I think your quote from B Marly ( whom I love) hit...I think your quote from B Marly ( whom I love) hit it RIGHT on the money. How dare his mom act as though she and her family are a cut above the company. She has NO DAMN IDEA what kind of spiritual growth and strength your achieving. Sounds like someone doesn't understand the atonement.Chad and Bree Fowleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06519711062097575162noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-82052424865556006042010-06-22T18:57:12.803-07:002010-06-22T18:57:12.803-07:00My mother in law LOVED me, until the day we got ma...My mother in law LOVED me, until the day we got married. Not sure exactly what made her change her mind, but from that very day (starting first thing that morning with the wedding breakfast) she decided that nothing I did was good enough or right enough for her. It was a rough several years before we mended fences. It sucked. We've been married 13 years now, and the last 5 have been ok. I wouldn't consider us good friends at all, but we are cordial with each other at family gatherings. We've even made a couple of day trips together to go shopping. It is what it is. My DH was great about sticking up for me, and being on "my side" of things. If he wasn't that way, I don't think our marriage would have lasted. It really takes a toll on things.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-86533323996816900602010-06-22T18:06:33.919-07:002010-06-22T18:06:33.919-07:00I tend to have a breakdown once a month. Sometimes...I tend to have a breakdown once a month. Sometimes if I'm lucky it's every other month. The stress doesn't end with marriage and I'm sure you feel you are getting a taste of that with this whole mother-in-law thing. So is she planning to come for the wedding? Cause that's awkward... :)<br /><br />I didn't feel like I had a best girlfriend for a really long time. Years. And then I met Jeana and I'd been married for 2 years before I met her. So even though a future best friend won't replace Jessica, I wouldn't give up on having one. You could even start praying for one. At the same time, most newlyweds are pretty into each other for the first year, so at least this way a best girl friend won't feel neglected while you are adjusting to married life.<br /><br />One thing that is nice about living outside of Utah is that most of the members you are in contact with are solid ones. It's harder when the not to solid ones are so prevalent. It can mess with your resolve. <br /><br />Sorry for the novel. Love you! I'm so glad that you were able to find comfort in prayer. :)<br /><br />Good luck on the job front, you aren't alone in this economy when it comes to searching for a job. Money issues are always a HUGE stress. Try to work together with Tayler to find a system that you both agree on for handling money.Erikahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11841804064852974740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-14860040539333221932010-06-22T16:19:35.915-07:002010-06-22T16:19:35.915-07:00As always, I love you.
Praying for you.As always, I love you. <br /><br />Praying for you.Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14902035006497878641noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-252710940882586192010-06-22T14:33:24.273-07:002010-06-22T14:33:24.273-07:00Stefanie I'm sorry things are so hard right no...Stefanie I'm sorry things are so hard right now. I totally understand breaking down in those moments when everything seems overwhelming... had a lot of those moments the last few months, and week! I hope things get better for you... Praying for you.Candacehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09095067065636257786noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-46825930993522190252010-06-22T14:18:21.005-07:002010-06-22T14:18:21.005-07:00I wanna be on the Bachelorette soooo bad! Becca do...I wanna be on the Bachelorette soooo bad! Becca does too haha! I loved this blog. Sorry about your mother in law. Grrrr. My future mother in law doesn't like me purely because I'm WHITE!!! Soooo frustrating! I liked the part where you talked about having to have been strong for soo long then just wanting to be weak. I definitely know that feeling. :-( Great great post!myshel_01https://www.blogger.com/profile/09353604481431968523noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-56775635140861425652010-06-22T14:13:47.989-07:002010-06-22T14:13:47.989-07:00I can't think of the right words. I know the f...I can't think of the right words. I know the feelings of some of the things you wrote about. Stress is so hard to deal with. I hope you continue to find the comfort you need.birthmothertalkshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17690158739622745922noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1640786534203215797.post-13242189495167294972010-06-22T13:23:44.589-07:002010-06-22T13:23:44.589-07:00Stefanie, i love what you are saying. I agree with...Stefanie, i love what you are saying. I agree with the mormon thing, i grew up in canada, and i was so shocked when i moved here. And im so sorry about Tayler's mom, i hope that things can be sorted out. That must be such a pain. I know that you are so strong and loving, though. You can make it through anything. I love you :)Mariel Conrad (Hansen)https://www.blogger.com/profile/01495488258461599758noreply@blogger.com